put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
