even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
