all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
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i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
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I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..