Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize