Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
