Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
