Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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