I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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