Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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