Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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