Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
