Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I'm passing your future prison.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
