btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize