How'd it feel making her break her religion?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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