Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
