ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
