"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
