I'm lost and stupid without you.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
