i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You ruined the universe
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
