Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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