Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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