I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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