Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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