You just made me feel so damn special
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
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