I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
