I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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