his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
