Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Randomize
