I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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