My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
