they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
