If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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