I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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