i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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