But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
