Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
