is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
