I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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