Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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