She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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