He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
