So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize