is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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