So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
