I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
