Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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