no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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