Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
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Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
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I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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