I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Randomize
