Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
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