Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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